Sometimes boredom could be a good trigger to think about something (hopefully) more energizing and productive. So when I am feeling a bit low, I decide to give myself a second thought about what might be important in my daily routine other than being grumpy at the office about my kryptonite and catching up the commuter line to/from work.
And I find one of them. The make up. I never realized that just thinking about me, in prettier and better look, has lifted my mood most of the time as high as 1000%.
Back then when I was a teenager, I always thought it was not cool to wear make up; it was like a scary mask that cover up the truth. Kinda distrusted the most important part of yourself. Nay. Not me. When I was in my 20s, I never thought that I needed to wear it. Light-colored lipstick did fine for me to go around the campus; of course, totally unnoticed by every cool guys there. When I was in my 30s, my eyes couldn’t be fooled anymore: women do look better when they are wearing suitable and decent make up, no matter what lies inside (we’re not talking about kindness and compassion and good heart, as well as intelligence). But with the baby coming out, back to school matters, and more works at the office, I barely had time to learn and practice it properly.
Then, my 40s will come pretty soon, just in couple of years. And when I looked at the mirror, I couldn’t help raising my eye brows, asking “What have (not) I done to my face?”. I surely do put some items on my face but I still have no idea about make up. I bought some make up then threw them away untouched.
Now I finally consider it important… and urgent. Not because I don’t believe in inner beauty anymore, or because I was intimidated by glamour (a.k.a. threatening) beauty around me, or because I have lost my self-confidence in going natural (the term ‘natural’ has changed, by the way. It now means wearing make up but succesfully “look stunning without too much effort”). Definitely not because I'm going into the 40s tick-box.
The reasons are so simple, at least for me. It’s been 6 months since the first time I walked and started running on treadmill; it was 2 months ago that I developed fondness of running outdoor. And despite the challenges to take off my butt from the bed early in the morning, it was all fun. No pressure. Targets are made to be broken occassionally when things went so wrong after I started. So why not try on something new, something definitely as fun, something that make you see and feel better about life?
Wearing or not wearing make up could be a way to respect and live your own values. Mine are not clearly defined, but I’m a big fans of equality and acceptance, and I believe in hard work (smart work is already included). So when I popped out from ‘make-over box’, I want to feel the same comfort and confidence as while I’m not wearing make up at all. I am not in the effortlessly beautiful crowds. Just like any other things in my life that I have to do or give up something to get something, beauty surely costs me many things. But I’m ready to get more serious in that field (although I won’t make the make up essentials as my staples).
Lastly, I already have some basic items that I rarely use. It would be such a waste if I don't use it. Anything under our control that has already cost you but not generating any benefit is considered liabilities. So, let's turn my limited collections into assets!
The point is, I want to have more fun. There are a lot of other things in life considered uncontrollable, messy and pathetic. I could deal with some, but some were not that easy or they are beyond my power. So even if people don't see me the same way, just let me feel beautiful and gorgeous!
I wouldn’t ask for more.
Except Naked pallete from Urban Decay, Orgasm Blush from Nars, Mary Loumanizer from theBalm, Sigma brush set, and maybe couple of lipsticks and lip gloss. LOL.
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